So Harry Potter, What Next?

So what next after all the farewell parties and interviews are over? Does Harry Potter plan to tour the world? Or just bask in the glory of all the success he got when kids of his age were learning how to spell success? Well, from what I know, he wouldn't be doing either! He's got some serious work. He has his hands full. So says Mugsy my messenger.

Mugsy - My Messenger

Here's the list of assignments Harry Potter has been proposed:

Indian premier Manmohan Singh has connected with Albus Dumbledore, the founder and leader of the Order of the Phoenix. Now that Voldemort is dead, they may not need Potter for a while. So the Indian government can bring him on board. Scams, blasts, "foreign looking objects" on minsters' tables and much more is happening here which needs a wizard's touch to get sorted.

Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai has also written to Dumbledore. Too much of chaos. After the assassination of Karzai's half-brother and the bombing during his service at the mosque, the Taliban have now released a tape which shows them killing Pakitani policemen, "the enemies of Allah" as the Taliban calls them in the tapes. That's supposed to mean that the Taliban is the friend of Allah.

The third in the list is our immediate neighbour Pakistan. They want Harry to use his wizardry to tell them what's up. Who's who and what everybody in their country wants. Dumbledore is known to have told the Paki administration to come up with a more detailed and specific report. The country's leaders are confused about who should be assigned the tedious task of preparing an organised report about a messed up state. They have understood to have told Dumbledore that they would need Harry's assistance to do this job as well. Well, Dumbledore is walking around and humming to himself, keeping up to his name which means 'bumblebee' in early modern English.

Last but not the least, Mugsy tells me someone desperately wants Harry back home in Britain. Any guesses? Well, media mogul Rupert Murdoch is looking for a more effective paparazzi. Phone tapping landed him foam-pied in the House of Commons. Wizardry is a guaranteed fool proof technique. Atleast when the master wizard Harry Potter is at work, you can bet no one will get caught even if you published previous night's pictures straight from Prince William's bedroom.

Meanwhile, Gillette and all other shaving foam makers are already at work trying to find out the brand of the foam which a man "lobbed into Murdoch's face at point-blank range." Why this brand hunt now? Remember Bush being shoed at a press conference in Baghdad in Dec 2008?

The Turkish shoe company, Ramazan Baydan, that made the shoe, experienced an immediate surge in sales. It received 30,000 orders in the very first week after the incident!! Taking lead from this, foam-makers are now out to make a killing out of the pie in Murdoch's face. Let's see who hits the jackpot. Who knows even they may be thinking of hiring Harry Potter for the job.

Mugsy's out already to get the news.
Cartoon courtesy: Coghill